And . . . I'm Back. Mostly.

I thought it had been a few weeks since I last posted, but I just checked and see that I haven't said a peep on this thing in 52 days, which I think is some kind of personal record.

*whew*

A lot has been happening and, as someone who's always seen myself as energetic and pretty open about the details of my life, it's been interesting to watch both my desire and energy to write here evaporate as well as feeling quite suddenly that the most important stuff happening with me are not things I want to broadcast.

It's not that I've been out killing puppies or otherwise doing heinous, shameful things and it's not that I'm not sharing the details of the important stuff with the friends and family I see in person.  It's just that I've lost, for the moment, my public voice. But maybe I'm getting it back.

It's a moment where I've thought a lot about this blog, which in one incarnation or another has existed for over a decade (though the earliest years are either lost to the ether or incarcerated on a Zip Disk I've yet to find). 

The moniker "joygantic," I've always thought of it more as an appellation, was picked for a bunch of reasons but, thematically, has always described to me a feeling--something instantiated in a moment or thing--that just made me instantly feel warm and fuzzy, giggly and elated, grateful and optimistic.  There was a period of time, years ago, when I felt I'd slipped into a blogging mode that was "and then I did that, and then I did this" and I backed away for awhile, thought about shutting down this project.  But I found a voice which was authentic, surely warbled here and there, but seemed true. 

Right now I'm waiting for that moment to percolate up again; it's starting to right now as I type.  Because I don't have any desire to add to the noise or the bullshit that is so easy to find online.  These pixels are mine and are about expressing my enthusiasm, sharing my life, and connecting with people.  It's going to be awhile still before I've fully got my feet under me, but a note from a friend in New York today made me realize that there are some folks out there I love who I don't get to see often in person, who might want to know what's going on.

So here's some of what's been going on over the past 60 or so days, in no particular order:

• Dia moved to San Diego on July 4th.
• I've been eating more ice cream than usual.
• With no couch I set up a tent in the living room for a week.  It was like a fort.  Or a dog crate.  Good stuff.
• Occasionally I get pain in my stomach from my surgery--I can feel the muscles adapting to being pierced by staples--but this seems to be part of the never-explained healing process since things that hurt for a while stop hurting and new, adjacent things hurt.
• I have been working hard to make the acquisition of our company a success, despite having low energy reserves and a flaky short-term memory.  I am having some success.
• I spoke at a conference in DC and wowed the audience.
• I've been to NYC, San Diego, DC, VA, Chicago, and San Francisco since I last posted.
• From the sixth row, I watched a gaunt Steve Jobs show off the new 3G iPhone, but have not yet bought one.
• I bought a flat panel TV and an X-Box and have decided that GTA4 is a form of meditation.
• This last weekend I spent 36 hours unsuccessfully trying to get to the East Coast.  My airline sent me an apology email.
• I officiated the wedding of two lovely people I'd met twice before.
• I saw my brother and sister-in-law for the first time in . . . too long . . . and had the best time.
• I toasted my mother who's spent the past 10 years surviving breast cancer.  And I got to talk to and hug my dad a lot.  I'm happy to report I just love my parents.
• I planted some squash, basil, and tomatoes.
• I've spent some lovely time with Erica and with a host of other dear people that I don't see often enough . . .
• I "acted" in a couple of videos that will premiere in a few weeks as part of friends' burlesque performance.
• Today I made the first To-Do list I've made in four months . . .
• I bought two couches: A cheapo IKEA thing that currently occupies my living room, and a lovely lovely couch that's coming in October.
• Today I took a picture of Alex the cat peacefully sleeping in the sun.  Sadly, he will not be with me much longer.
• The countdown to Burning Man has begun and I'm so so looking forward to my annual New Year celebration.  Now more than ever.
• In general, I'm at the beginning of a period of examining habits and assumptions and general ways of being; I'm rebooting. 

Comments

[Ellen in VA]

Welcome back, Mark!